My father's daughter

On April 26, 2009 a goofy, smart, driven, stubborn and charismatic man left this earth too soon: my dad.  Below are some excerpts from the eulogy that I gave at his U.S. memorial service. He'd probably love the attention of being featured on my blog and he would probably say that I should have included the whole eulogy, but I think what's included below will give everyone a great idea of what I miss most about him. As always, thanks for reading. :)

He was a huge ham who loved the camera, a trait I have apparently inherited.  His huge smile, crazy laugh and mugging for the camera…ANY camera…are some of the top memories that I hear about again and again.  When my husband sees me jump in front of the camera and give a cheesy smile or do one of my silly impressions he just shakes his head and notes, “You’re more like your dad than you think you are.” 

Big smiles throughout the years

He loved singing and dancing – The skits and line dances at filipino parties, the family recordings in the late 70’s, the multiple karaoke sessions...  To think of my dad is to remember his huge love for a good tune that he could dance or sing to…or better yet, both!  I have no doubt of where my love of show choir, karaoke bars, and dance clubs comes from.

He was detail oriented and knew how to backup an argument.  When I was accepted for admissions to Duke as a high school senior, I wanted nothing more than to go there, no matter what the cost.  Like most teenage girls, I didn’t really have a concept of how expensive it really would be, nor did I really have a concept of how much money my parents did or did not have.  My dad knew this, so before he let me make a decision, he illustrated what the cost of Duke would REALLY be.   

He did this by sitting me down on the couch and pulling out an easel and a flip chart and giving me a 20-minute presentation with graphs, statistics, and comparisons to show just how expensive Duke would be for them.  But being the strong-headed teenager I was, I didn’t budge.   

Exasperated, he said that if I went to Tech or UVA, they would buy me a new car.   

I still chose Duke.  And as my sister likes to point out, I still got a car. :)

He loved to teach.  In my freshman year, I was not doing too well in physics.  My dad wanted me to succeed, of course, and wanted to help me the best way he knew how.  One day, I went to my campus mailbox and pulled out a large letter-sized package from home.  I excitedly tore into it thinking it looked like something fun, but instead I pulled out 4 sheets of graph paper with 6 hand-written physics problems that my dad had made up.  Included were instructions for me to do the problems and mail them back to him for him to grade.  And he wasn’t kidding.  

Graduation day from Duke!

He LOVED to watch sports and especially NCAA Basketball.  I think this is why he was secretly happy that I chose to go to Duke.  When I was little, we would stay up late together to watch UVA basketball (in what would come to be the heyday of UVA basketball).  He would also never miss a chance to watch his alma mater Louisville.  Even when he was in the Philippines in the spring, he’d always manage to stay on top of March Madness and taunt me when his Cardinals went farther than my Blue Devils in the tournament.

Dad and I at the Thinker statue in Louisville, 44 years apart!

He was persistent and stubborn.  While this may seem like a negative, it was truly one of his best traits.  His persistence got him from his humble working-class beginnings in the Philippines to a scholarship to graduate school in Thailand where he met my mom.  So smitten was he the instant that he met her, that he pursued her tirelessly.  My mom says she tried to avoid and ignore him but he “wore her down.”  When my sister and I would ask how he proposed she would say, “I don’t know, he asked me to marry him SO many times!” His persistence paid off again when she finally said yes, married him, and moved to the US with him in 1966.   

They didn’t have much, but they had love and determination.  Dad always had a single-minded goal to be successful and make his mark on the world, and that he clearly has.

Mom & Dad when he was just a thorn in her side. :)

Dad & Mom in front of Burruss Hall in 1976 - his 3rd MS degree!
32 years later, ProMo and I starting working right next door.

After 3 master's and a PhD, Dad finally fulfilled his dream to teach.
Photo taken at De La Salle University commencement (Manila, Philippines), where he was a professor.

Some family pictures:

First family photo.  Yes, I am a potato.

Outside of Patton Hall for sister's graduation reception!

Watching the Macy's Thanksgiving Parade in NYC, 2001

40th Anniversary Celebration

The last family photo, Christmas 2008

While I may not have seen eye to eye with him on all his decisions, I can say without a doubt that he made every decision out of love.   He wanted nothing more than to see his family and loved ones succeed in life and love.  I can only hope I did him proud during his time on earth, and that I will continue to do him proud as I continue on my own journey.

 

We miss and love you, DAD!!