Everyone Could Use a Holiday

"Raise your hand if you think it's the engineer's fault? ... Raise your hand if you think it's the contractor's fault? ... Raise your hand if you're not paying attention? ..."

Yes folks, this actually came out of my mouth during class today. 

And yes, everyone is ready for spring break.

As I looked out into the abyss that is my warehouse-like classroom, there were a lot of things that went through my head. I confess that most of these thoughts had absolutely nothing to do with what I was talking about.  Honestly, this happens to me a lot.  I mean, it's not so crippling that I lose my train of thought, but it happens often enough that I have (easily) come up with a list of my top 10 thoughts in class (outside of the material I'm teaching, of course).  Here they are, in no particular order.

1. "Dude, wake up. I can see you sleeping."

Seriously? At least TRY to fake it. 

2. "Wow - a packed house.  They must think I'm giving a pop quiz today."

Because after 4 semesters, sometimes I truly believe that's the only reason they show up.

3. "They look bored. Why are they bored? Because I'm talking about the law?  Should I crack a joke? Will they get it? Do I look as weird as I feel?"

This probably goes through my head about 80% of the time that I look up.

4. "Oh my gosh...I just made a reference to something that happened when I was in high school and they weren't even born yet."

Yet another reminder that I am sadly not as young as I feel or look.

5. "Are they gonna get this OJ Simpson reference? Do the words, 'If the glove don't fit, you must acquit' mean anything to them?"

See #4

6. "Hey kid. Get off of Facebook."

Self explanatory.  Although in their defense, I probably would have done the same thing in my class...if Facebook, twitter, email (hell, even laptops) were as widespread then as they are now.

7. "I hear you talking and I know you're not talking about proximate cause, vicarious liability or supervening illegality."

I get that it's not the most interesting stuff.  And I know you're dying to talk about something else with your buddies.  But the least you can do is IM, gchat, tweet, etc. etc.  Don't talk to each other in a volume so loud that I can hear you across the room.  It's not that hard people.

8. "I wish I knew more people's names."

I know some faces, I know most names, but it makes me sad that I can't always put them together.  I feel really strongly that the students don't go through college feeling anonymous, so this one makes me pretty sad.

9. "Please pay attention to me. This is on the exam and I will feel guilty when/if you all don't get it right."

At the end of the day, I know I can only do so much to get them to actually listen.  But I get a MAJOR guilt complex if students don't do well on my exams.  Rather than blaming it on them not paying attention in class, I blame it on myself. I need to get over this.

10. "I hope I'm getting through to them and they're actually learning."

Despite, (or maybe because of) all the goofing off, I have to say the most gratifying thing for me is when they say thanks or say that they actually enjoyed the class.  At times, I know it's difficult to sit through...I even bore myself. But I think that makes it even better when they email me after they've graduated with a story about how they handled an ethical dilemma at work or how they used some of my resume and interview tips to land a job.  I know I've actually gotten through to them.  And that's a really great feeling. :)

AAANNNDDD... just to cap it off, a GLEE reference!!  When I originally saw this particular episode I found Gwyneth Paltrow's character, Holly Holiday, pretty irritating.  Then I realized that I may just want to be like her.  Aside from hanging out w/Mr. Schuster (which is incentive enough), she gets to spend class time busting out in Top 40 songs and dancing around the room with the students, then going out for tacos!

You go, Holly Holiday!