a strong, innate desire to rove or travel about.
I lived in the same house from the summer before kindergarten through high school graduation, and came back to that same house for 24 years until my parents retired to the beach. There are too many memories to recall readily though I know they involved hours on the phone, laughter, tears, boy band obsession, and an absurd amount of neon.
I loved growing up in that neighborhood, with the same friends living on my street. I met so many of them when we entered kindergarten together at 5 years old and (thanks to Facebook) I'm still in touch with a lot of them today. Throughout college and beyond, I loved to come home to the same house, the same mall, and...Ukrop's.
Because of this, I always thought that I would find a home quickly after I graduated (whether it was Richmond or not...it was DEFINITELY going to be a sweet southern town), marry my high school/college boyfriend, settle down, have kids, and give them a similar experience.
Wow.
While I'm sure that there are plenty of people who make this kind of firm declaration and follow through, I clearly was not one of them.
Instead, my high school sweetheart and I parted ways in grad school and I moved to Baltimore. I loved my job and friends there but about a year and a half later, a bigger pull (ProMo) prompted my move to an even bigger city. The Big Apple.
Three years, one battle with cancer, and one terrorist attack later, I moved back to Charm City.
But wouldn't you know it...four years later, other factors beckoned me to the Nation's capital and I found myself in the heart of Washington DC.
I loved it. I loved my job, my friends, my tiny yet awesomely located apartment, and the general energy of the city. It was about that time, 10 years after graduating from grad school, that I realized that I just may be a "city person." I had yet to live in a "sweet southern town" and I felt far from settled. Still, I had the feeling that the little girl who craved small-town life was still in me. So when ProMo got the job in the 'burg, I didn't think of it as a challenge, I thought of it as an adventure and an opportunity to find out once and for all if the small-town life was for me.
Now this may come as a surprise to some of you, but there is a lot that I really like about the 'burg. It is a beautiful place filled with wonderful, warm people and some of my closest friends came from my time there. I love a good challenge, and trying to get 21 year old engineers interested in contract law and insurance is definitely a challenge. :) And there are few things that beat sitting on a deck with a great glass of wine and a view of the mountains.
But I never really felt like I could be myself there. Whether it was because of my job, ProMo's job, the lack of like-minded peers, or because of the wanderlust, I always had a bit of a guard up. While I personally was uncomfortable with never being truly "anonymous" [for example, how many people reading this right now are former students of mine or ProMo's?], I know that this is the exact "small town feel" that so many people crave.
Soon, I could not longer deny it. I am a city girl.
Now, I'm not blind or deaf so I realize that there is a lot about this move that is confusing or worrisome to my friends and family. But in actuality, here's all there is to it: I know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that the benefits of moving to DC - for myself, my relationships, and my career - far outweigh the negatives or uncertainties.
So maybe this wanderlust is really just a symptom of my never finding the right geographical fit.
Maybe I'm genetically predisposed for restlessness (my parents are immigrants who traveled extensively, after all).
Maybe it's all just a midlife crisis.
Maybe I'm just being selfish.
Maybe I'm doing what so many people wish they could do but fear failure.
I obviously don't have the answers, but I know that after a month in DC, I'm happy and I finally feel like I'm where I belong. Wanderlust? Nope...not right now anyway. But you may want to ask me again in a year, or two, or three. :)
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